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I don’t mind when intelligent actors speak out on issues that are important to them. In fact, I encourage it. George Clooney, Don Cheadle, Angelina Jolie, they all have causes that are important to them and they use their celebrity status and money to do some good.
What I don’t like is when the stupid ones try to make concrete comments. Like Kirsten Dunst commenting on Sam Raimi’s possible departure from the Spider-Man film franchise if he ends up getting the chance to direct The Hobbit. She says that she won’t come back for Spider-Man 4 if Raimi leaves. She explains, “It’s disrespectful to the whole team, I think, to do that. And audiences aren’t stupid. It’d be a big flop without me, Tobey Maguire or Sam. That would really not be the smartest move.”
Um, maybe no one told her that she was never right for the role of Mary Jane Watson to begin with. Maybe no one told her that she transformed Mary Jane from Spider-Man’s likable girlfriend into someone who I wish had been killed off in the first movie. I think if it hadn’t been for her, I would have been able to tolerate how bad the first movie was. And even though I loved the second movie, I still thought she was completely disposable.
I hear Jake Gyllenhal is in talks to take over for Tobey Maguire. He could definitely do it. I actually would have liked to have seen him in the first two movies. But Kirsten Dunst is really not necessary to the film’s sucess. Sam Raimi, definitely (I mean look what happened to X-Men when Bryan Singer left). Tobey Maguire, he grew on me in the second film. But Kirsten Dunst, please get rid of her. And for her to think that the success of the franchise rests on her presence is ridiculous.
But what do you expect from someone whose last name rhymes with Dunce?
The study of Biochemistry is cool. I think my favorite part was learning about the different levels of structure of proteins: primary, secondary, tertiary, and quaternary. I don’t remember much of the specifics of the class as I didn’t do that well in it (I’ll be re-taking it at San Jose State soon), but one of the cool things about is the way the protein molecules fold in order to pack it in so tightly. The folding is accomplished through bonding of different parts of the molecule, and it is through the folding that the molecule begins to take shape.
Today was one of those days where I could see the parts of my life starting to fold and bringing shape to my future. In my paranoia and anxiety, I had begun to despair and paint a defeatist picture of the future.
The other day I sent my summer readmission for UCLA and felt good about myself and my chances of being accepted for the summer. I started to look forward to going back and studying Physiology there and settling into a new life again. Then today, I started doing some calculations and discovered that even if I am admitted for the summer, it won’t be a great option for my future plans, as I want to go to graduate school in the sciences, and if I go back to UCLA, I won’t be able to realistically pull my GPA up to grad school level.
I was depressed about it for about 2 hours. I told my sister because I had to tell someone. I can’t keep things inside. I have to get them out or I get more depressed. I guess I can’t really do anything about it, and I just have to accept it. I never really had any dreams of going to UCLA, except when I first decided that I wanted to go to film school, but I gave up on that a long, long time ago. So I’m not exactly sure why I was fighting for it so much, or letting it get me down. I’m in a great Forensic Science program right now, one with amazing connections to the field. This is what I wanted to go into all those years ago, so I should be immersing myself in it. So what if I won’t have a biology degree from a UC. Big deal. When did that become important to me? That’s what has been holding me in place academically for so long. The pursuit of something that was never important to me to begin with. The degree in what I wanted to do is what is important, and that is what I’m just starting to realize.
I had a conversation with my friend’s girlfriend a while back about the difference between CSUs and UCs. CSUs are for people who know what they want to do. UCs are for people who don’t know what they want to do. The paths are very different, as one is more focused, and the other isn’t. I know what I want to do, and yet I spent so much time trying to get onto the unfocused path. Now I’m being forced off the unfocused path and onto the focused one, the one I should have been on, the one my ego kept me from.
And then I talked to my girlfriend, and she has an amazing vision of our future together. And it gave me hope, the protein folding that I mentioned above. And now that my path is free from distractions, I have to do my part. So that is what I’m going to do.
