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Graduation time is upon us once again and, once again I find myself on the sidelines watching friends and acquaintances wrap up the academic chapter of their life while I seem to be stuck on the same page. While I feel happy for them that they are moving forward, that happiness is tinged with a little bit of bitterness and resentment. It’s not directed towards them, at least not intentionally. It should be directed entirely at myself, but it’s easier to direct it at others. However, while it’s easier, it’s not exactly the best way to deal with the situation. Misplacing anger and resentment at others when it should be placed upon yourself only makes the situation worse. It gives room for false justification and unnecessary acceptance for your lot in life, rather than inspiring change. My situation is completely my fault, and no one else’s. We are who we choose to be. And up to this point, I’ve chosen not to fully realize my potential, instead focusing my attention on trivial matters that don’t get me anywhere.
I keep looking for things that will provide solutions to initiate change in my life. But as I think about it, I already know the answer. It is, simply, “do it.”
I want to become a better student. So I just have to focus my attention on the material when I’m studying, instead of thinking of things I’d rather be doing. I want to develop my writing. So I have to write and study the craft of writing, instead of aimlessly surfing the internet. I want money. So I need to actively look for a job, instead of aimlessly surfing the internet. There are so many things I want to do, and I just have to do them. It’s not even that I find excuses as to why I can’t. It’s just that I don’t do them.
Aimlessly surfing the internet seems to be the biggest block in my life. I think I may be addicted to the internet. If that’s the case, I need to take steps toward eliminating that addiction.
The next time I post an entry regarding this subject, I want to be able to point to clear examples of things I’ve done to light a fire under my ass and kick my life into gear. I’m 25 years old and my life hasn’t even begun. I’m still stuck in that moment from two years ago, when I confessed my feelings for the girl to whom I gave my heart. It’s hard to believe the aftermath of one event can still be so paralyzing.
It’s time for me to just let it go. It’s time for me to stop analyzing it. It’s time for me to stop looking for a resolution. It’s time for me to give away the stone. It’s dead weight that’s holding be back. It’s over. The waters will kiss and transmutate this leaden grudge into gold.
Let go.
Let go.
Let go.
The film adaptation of The Da Vinci Code is opening to bad reviews. I find myself experiencing a paradox of surprise. I’m surprised that it is getting bad reviews, while at the same time I was expecting it to receive bad reviews, if that makes any sense. It most likely does not. Let me explain. The entire publishing world is enamored with the book. The majority of the people who read it find it to be the greatest thing since Internet porn. Yes, I think Internet porn is a much greater invention than sliced bread. I too was caught up in the Da Vinci Code frenzy when I first read the book two years ago. However, once the initial amazement wore off, I found it to be a badly written story with boring characters, cheap page turning hooks, and a subject matter that was meant to distract you from the fact that it is not a very good book. Some people have disagreed with me on this. However, these are people who judge a film’s quality based on the looks of the actors in the film. These are the people who make copies of films like Garfield, The Pacifier, and Catwoman. These are people who thought Constantine and Queen of the Damned were good movies. Perhaps you disagree with me as well. Humor me for a moment. If you’re one of the many people around the world who have read the book, how many times have you found yourself engaging in discussions about the plot of the book? By plot, I mean the actual events that the characters engage in. Go on. Take a moment. Think about it. OK, time’s up.
I’ll bet you a dollar that the answer to my question is either zero or one. When people talk about the book, they generally discuss the book’s controversial subject matter, that the Holy Grail is not actually a chalice, but a record of the lineage of Jesus of Nazareth and Mary Magdalene, which is kept hidden in the tomb of Mary Magdalene. Supposedly this secret was covered by the Knights Templar and is continued to be covered up by a shadow organization known as the Priory of Sion. I won’t get into the ongoing debate of whether any of it has any truth to it. It is an interesting idea that merits further study.*
However, this is not the plot of the book. These are historically fictional events which the plot revolves around. If you take away the controversial subject and place the characters into a similar series of events that revolve around some other subject matter, it would be easier to see it for what it is. But lines become severely blurred when a person’s religion is brought up. They are blurred even further when the religion of roughly 1 billion people is the target. Yes, Catholics are Christians. Stop interrupting. Catholic groups, especially Opus Dei, which is portrayed as a villainously cruel sect in the story, are up in arms over the book and its film adaptation. Nevermind the fact that it is a work of fiction. People tend to get very touchy when you talk about their religion, even in a work of fiction. Apparently you can’t make things up regarding religious figures. The disclaimer at the beginning of the book does not state that the events in the book are true. It states “All descriptions of artwork, architecture, documents and secret rituals in this novel are accurate.” No where does it say “All descriptions of religious figures are accurate.” The author attempted to create a story around a “what-if” scenario, which is the basis of any fictional story. Every author plays with the idea of “what if this happened?” or “what if that happened?” Brown’s “what if” wasn’t very well executed, but that doesn’t seem to matter in the minds of all the people who read it. Stupid sheep. It could have been so much better in the hands of a more accomplished writer, but what’s done is done.
Anyway, that is my prelude to my upcoming The Da Vinci Code film review. I most likely will be seeing with my cousin this weekend, and I wanted to give you an idea of how I’m heading into the film.
Until then. Keep blogging, bitches.
* Someone remind me to get a copy of Holy Blood, Holy Grail.
I’m ready to draw blood. I logged into Ticketmaster exactly at 10AM to get Radiohead tickets, and it had me waiting in the cyberspace equivalent of a line and when it had dropped down to a two minute wait, the phone rang at my cousin’s house and disconnected their DSL line. It came back on two minutes later, and tickets were sold out. This was seven minutes after they went on sale. I hate the person who called. They just moved straight to the top of my “Strangle” list, which is weird because they were on my list of favorite people just a short while ago. How quickly things can change.
http://www.cnn.com/2006/TRAVEL/05/01/free.travel/index.html
